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Filling Out Forms

As part of my job, such as it is, I have to occasionally tabulate huge piles of forms. This is, of course, out of the dark ages, but that is neither here nor there, as it is my job.

This is just a comment from the other end of the world of forms. If you are filling out forms or surveys, there are a few simple guidelines that you should adopt and use forever.

These may seem obvious, but you’d be surprised.

If the question is asking for the latest, most, least, first, or any other extreme of something you did, mark one thing. Household income cannot be 50,000 and 75,000. Pick one you jack-off.

Read the questions. If the question is only if you answered yes to number four and you did not, don’t fill it in.

Read the answers. Don’t go along happily marking every damn thing, only to realize there is an all of the above answer.

if the question is a range type question say 1 for least and 5 for most, don’t mark both 2 and 3, and don’t write in 2.5. We are not tabulating 2.5. Just pick one. Also, don’t write “sometimes 5 and sometimes 1″ in the side column. How would this help our statistics?

Don’t just leave questions blank. This screws up the total counts and percentages.

If the survey or form is asking for your ethnicity, just answer the question. Answer it as you think of yourself, or failing that, how others probably think of you. I used to think it was cool to mark other and write something like “American” or some such, but that was when I was like fifteen. I understand your purpose. That we should all be thought of as one, and all that. I even agree in general life, but for the purposes of forms, just fill out the question. It is almost certain that is will not be used to track down all the latino males and send jack-booted thugs to cave their skulls in. It will however be helpful to know that a specific program is most often attended by white females, and not at all by asian males. This may help the researcher, or whoever, to examine why this is, and to determine if an adjustment needs to be made to make something match a target group better.

So much better to have these things online.

It smells a little like sour milk in here. I better figure out why.

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